Another thought is...will it even make a difference? I could keep barbies out of the house, but she will be around them at friends houses. She will see them in stores. And she may still end up wanting to dress like them, or maybe even dress immodestly behind my back anyway. Something I am guilty of myself. Sorry Mom. OR... I could allow her all the barbies she wants, and she could end up just the way I hope she will. I am so frustrated!! I don't know what to do!! Well, actually, now after having written this all down...I think I do. But I would love to hear your thoughts...
Monday, December 5, 2011
to Barbie or not to Barbie
Having a daughter has changed the way I look at the world...in so many ways. I worry about so many things and how they will affect her and the rest of her life. I want her to be a confident woman. So many women struggle with low self esteem. I think that a large part of the cause is the image of the "perfect woman" all over magazines. And when I look at Barbies, with their perfect bodies, it makes me wonder if they are the right kind of "roll models" for my daughter. They are so skimpily dressed. And Shelby really likes the way they dress. She wants to be just like the barbies. So, a while back I( very secretly) disposed of all the barbies. I'm trying to get her interested in other things. We got her an "Our Generation" doll form target. She likes it ok. She plays with it when I encourage her. But when we talk about Christmas, and Santa, she still talks about how much she loves barbies and all she wants is barbies. I feel so bad! I feel like such a mean Mom. Did I do the wrong thing? But if I let her have barbies, and she wants to dress like them, how can I tell her that she can't. It will seem quite hypocritical to her I think.
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3 comments:
I think that if you are able to find some barbies that are more on the modest side (if they exist) then maybe one or two wouldn't be the end of the world. I know they have some that are just way inapporiate and I wouldn't want them in my house. I know you will make the right decision because you are such an amazing mom. Love ya!!
Emily hasn't gotten into the Barbies yet, but we talk all the time about modesty especially in stores when shopping for clothes. If she likes a tank top, or two piece swim suit I tell her "That's immodest so we shouldn't wear it." I've been surprised at how much impact these little teaching moments have had on her. We'll be watching tv and a lady in a bikini might come on, and she'll say (in a disgusted tone) "Mom, she is IMMODEST" and I say you're right she is, we don't dress that way. So maybe when she gets a barbie that is immodest take her shopping for an outfit for the doll that IS modest so she can see what is and isn't appropriate. It's a scary world we live in and it's just going to get worse-if we could shelter them from everything our jobs would be so much easier as moms! But instead I think we have to teach them how to live virtuously in an un-virtuous world. We have our work cut out for us with teenage girls...I'm not looking forward to it!! You're such an amazing mom Heidi, the fact that you care so much means more than Shelby could ever know! Miss you!
My girls have a lot of Barbies. And they think their clothes are beautiful, but they know what they are allowed to wear and what a toy is allowed to wear are two different things. It hasn't been an issue for us. We've talked about it and it hasn't seemed to confuse them. good luck! =)
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